Mindfulness is bloody hard

This is one of the most difficult concepts for me to not argue against. What do meeeeaaaannnn I’m not my thoughts and feelings?!? Of course I am! Oh wait, thank gods I’m not. With a brain that runs a hundred directions at once, really, thank gods I am not.

My essence, my love that is life force, the whatsit in us that drives and powers all that is, I know are not my thoughts and feelings. It is so much more and so much less than the story in my head. In those sparse and atm rare moments that I remember this, I find peace within.

How we met

I know it’s been forever since I’ve posted here, but I love this story.

On this day 32 years ago the hubster and I met on a blind date arranged by mutual friends. We 6 grouped at a table in a bar/restaurant (The Office Lounge) that had live music. He disappeared for 1 1/2 hours to “take care of a household chore he’d left midway thru doing to come out” on the date. Chore: draining a waterbed. I thought he’d merely used an original gonna-ditch-ya line. No one was more surprised than I was when he returned. He feigned insult I thought he’d split, but much later admitted he’d planned the waterbed emptying to have an out if he didn’t like the setup. He dressed down for the date so I had figured he wasn’t interested in dating, anyway. I was wrong. He asked for my phone number.

Two weeks later we went out alone and timing made it St. Patrick’s day. We drank green beer at Lacky’s.We played duck pin bowling and I learned he was as competitive as I was. That evening he interrogated me (he denies this and claims he was only trying to get to know me, but I was there, and he definitely had a check list of questions in his head). I must have passed.

A few months later he proposed. And 6 months and 5 days after we met we got married in my parent’s backyard amongst the flowers.

Happy 32nd dateversary, Dave! I love you more now than then. ♥️